Coming Soon To The EADJ Crappinema: "Gooby"

Prejudice is a terrible thing. So when I first saw the poster and then the following trailer for the "family friendly" movie "Gooby," I was automatically filled with revulsion and convinced that this story of a friendless kid learning life lessons from an imaginary bear would be a well meaning but shit-awful turd of a movie.

But that's the very definition of prejudice, isn't it? "Pre-judging" something before that something has the opportunity to completely show you how bad it is on its own.

I now hereby withhold all judgement of this hideous, dead-eyed "monster-type" E.T. ripoff until I see it in its entirety. Soon, bitches.

So How Did Tara Do?

"Vipers" was bad. I think everyone involved in the entire pre-production, production, post-production, and marketing of the film knew that. It was never going to run against "Albert Nobbs" or "The Tree of Life," and its premise was about as unremarkable as its main star, a still-pretty but past-her-prime, C-level actress who can't really act. So I went into this one with low expectations and found that it was actually pretty fun making fun of it.

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For that reason alone I placed "Vipers" in the more favorable half of the EADJ Crappinuum. The movie-watching experience was actually not like shoving pine cones in my butthole or stabbing my eye sockets with steak knives. Or stabbing my butthole with steak cones. What is the matter with me.

The EADJ Crappinema Presents Vipers, starring Tara Reid

As ordered by the Court in April 2008, the County of Los Angeles mandated that Tara Reid star in the movie "Vipers" to fulfill her 120 hours of community service. Once the film had been completed, Tara was to deliver the film to her probation officer and serve the rest of her sentence at its premiere and DVD release party.

Overall grade: F