I Enjoyed This Cut To Commercial During The Last "Breaking Bad"

[Spoiler alert]

THIS IS AN OUTRAGE

I got my Entertainment Weekly in the mail the other day and noticed something very, very wrong about the ad on the back.


Unlike other versions of this "Client List" ad featuring Jennifer Love Hewitt, I did not feel the strong urge to motorboat it. Was there something wrong with me?


No. The fact is, this EW ad was censored. Instead of the former "Party Of Five" actress's buxom bosom pouring out of her bodice like two pink water snake toys, some Puritan at the Entertainment Weekly news desk demanded that her chest be covered. After all, this is a wholesome magazine covering the popular erotic novel, "Fifty Shades of Grey."


Actually, my theory is that the publishers told the Lifetime Channel marketing team that they could get the high-profile back cover, but only if they sacrifice some cleavage and Photoshop some more material on Morty and Chet. That, my friends, is what is known as a Faustian bargain.

My Thought Process Upon Seeing That Ad For "The Client List," Starring Jennifer Love Hewitt

1) Whoa, baby! I gotta watch this these!

2) Lifetime? Oh. Okay, no thanks. They're not going to be showing much nip if the target audience is 50 year old cat lovers.

The good news is she has her own series. The bad news is, it's on Lifetime? So here's pretty much how I read the title of the show:


Still, tits.

UAG

Spotted On A New York Subway Platform

Forty feet underground and surrounded by concrete and glass, life finds a way.

A Find Like No Other

Ah, payphones. We've covered before how they're essentially New York's urinals, and that you can find a variety of wonderful treasures in them on any day.







The other week, however, while walking to a burrito place for lunch, I happened to glance into a set of payphones, when I saw a series of discarded paintings. One of which would change my life forever:



I have no idea who dumped this work of art here. This thing isn't signed by the artist. But I think it's easy to say that THIS IS THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER FOUND.

It is now sitting in my office at work. That's right.


Thank you, random artist! I'll treasure it forever, or at least until HR makes me remove it!