I have a French person staying with me

I thought that I would mention this. BUT THERE IS A FRENCH PERSON IN MY HOUSE. A FRENCH PERSON. Thankfully, one of my dogs loves him, and the other tried to bite him. God Bless you, Nusi.
I, of course, am being very polite. To him. To the rest of his countrymen I'm already cynically exploiting my English abilities for cruel effect. ie, to Ogg's french pal:

Me: Are you a fag?
French guy: *Mumble* *Confused look*
Me: What is the WEATHER like in England?
Ogg; Yeah, you faggot.

God, we're going to hell. But fuckit, I'm sure that they did the same to us. We also asked them what station they arrived at. Waterloo? WATERLOO? What, the station named after the famous ENGLISH VICTORY over the FRENCH? Irritatingly, they didn't seem to comprehend the meaning of the station, and hadn't even bothered to look at the name of the station. So that sort of burst our bubble. Perhaps they don't even teach Waterloo in French School. Perhaps they only teach the French their famous victories in their History classes. Man, that would be a short class.

Teacher: Now, le class, we are going to le learn about les famous victories de France. Open votres books on le page 1.
Class: But le sir, there is only le one page in zees book! And le its a list of the le publisher's information!
Teacher: Oui. End of the course.

Why, oh why, do the french bring out the racist xenophobe in me? Perhaps everybody is secretly racist. Can we ever truly be fully encopassing of our fellow man? I doubt it. Perhaps in all of us, the seeds of racism lurk.



This got me thinking about boobs. In particular, bra sizes. This led me to the following question:
What bra size would it be better to have, 12DD or 48AA?

Oli G: Well, three people say 12DD, but one person says 48AA.
Ogg: DD, of course.
I don't know why he chose that, as Steve is quite obviously 12-AA.
Fati: I refuse to take part in your sex thought driven surveys.
Roxxxay: I'd chose you, you are the perfect bra size.
Well, I'm not a bra. Although, I wouldn't mind being close to Roxy's tits. WINK WINK NUDGE NUDGE POKE.
Emma: 12DD, unless you have taken a recent fancy to make body builders.
WHAT... THE... FUCK? Poor, poor Emma. She has the brain skills of a duck.
Plus, she looks like one too. OOH RINSED.
Why do these adverts asking me if I'm about to start a long night's revision make me feel guilty, tight chested and worried? Oh, god. I even did some revision today. Actually, I didn't. I sat in the Library and read about 12 issues of White Dwarf. Why did I do that? I don't even like Warhammer. Or reading about it. Seriously, Warhammer actually sucks. In one particularly epic page, a guy whinged about how making a huge (read: three inches tall) model of a mammoth was "a real pain to make". THEN DON'T MAKE IT, YOU DIPSHIT.

Oh yeah, my survey. Well, I cap it off with was possibly the most Kris answer ever.

Kris: Sixty million years ago a lot of the countryside was marshy.

Can't say any truer than that.

Vote for me if you want to kick all the French out of Ireland!