Already I am ze - HICCUP! - pickled.

Fucking God.

I mean, most of his stuff is pretty ok.



The Earth? Fine.

Breasts? Good.

Light? Well, not bad.



But HICCUPS? I mean, why? Why God, why? Why did you think it was a good idea to make up hiccups. Gay hiccups. That sucks. So I was sitting there, hiccuping, when I had a thought.

PING... I know, I'm going to click on that button that says 'next blog' at the top of the page,' and see what the rest of the community has to offer.

Here's what I got:



About three pages in Spanish. And badly written Spanish. I can't figure out how they manage to to accents. This is what happens when I type 'n with squiggle on it,' : ñ. Odd.

A page in French with a picture of a fat topless lady on it *ugh*.

Two fancy ultra-htmled pages with HUGE pictures of Japanese Anime on them. Now, the amount of time and swearing it took me to figure out how to post ONE PICTURE at the top of it, arghhh. How do these people do it? Losers. In one of these, someone had posted their poems. POEMS? How much of a dipshit are you? Ooh, look at me with my rubbish poetry.



Blogs are for ranting and taking the piss out of people: FACT.

They are not for poetry. Shame on you.



Haha, a churchy blog for some jerkwater community. "We'll see how many people enjoy our blog, and see if we can include the rest of the community." Total posts: two. Total comments: ZERO. Take that, Jesus.

A blog about juvenile diseases. Great. Just what I felt like reading. Fucking hell... who the HELL looks up medical conditions on a blog? Pah.

For anybody who has come onto my blog for medical conditions here's my latest disease:



MORONITIS: For people who look up medical conditions on a blog. The only cure: Eating pebbles. Just keep eating them until you start bleeding. Then go and jump into a deep canal.



One in Kowean. Entitled 'journey of a blog', this is one of my more favourite posts: 不過,我還是作出了一個決定...就是增加內容為最優先事項! 其實這個決定不難理解的,因為貓網的內容真是太少了...怎能讓一個已經開站近五年的網頁還是只有空殼呢?而且以內容為本才是我想做到的貓網哦... P.S.且看能否在這個星期完成吧.... 注:這星期代表這七日內



Odd.

Finally, the funniest shit I have ever read. The only post read like this: I've started a blog because I'm bored and I really shout be beging to startmy novel. Oh well. I have a short intrest sapn for stuff like this on theinternet.

I mean, if you're going to be writing a novel, it'll help to have:

a: An attention span. An interest span doesnt exist. Neither does an interest sapn.

b: The ability to spell, dipshit.



Screw this. La di da di doo da da, wing tiddle winky la diddle da la.



Kill zombies wiv: Boxing gloves!