I just ate TWENTY FOUR of these cookies, but they're fat-free so it's okay.

Ah, 24. Show of gods.

For those that don't know, 24 is... actually fuck you. Go and buy it yourself.

Basically, its the adventures of Jack, one of the manliest men around. Like, he just wanders about killing people and blowing up buildings. I mean, he is by far the coolest. While the rest of his baby friends whinge and whine about an atomic bomb, he just goes about and GETS THE JOB DONE. No computer bollocks (24 is hilarious in this respect), no rubbish being nice to people, no political games. Just bloody rampage.

In this episode, he did the following:



Celebrated the blowing up of his office.

Shot about 7 guys.

Took out a dog with a shotgun (DUDE).

Knocked down a wall with a pickaxe.



That was just one day. I mean, here is a list of Jack's other greatest hits:



Taking off his chum's hand with an axe. AN AXE. Only topped by chainsaw for wicked-beats weapons. Actually there are loads.

Kicking a drug habit in less than 8 hours. Hardcore.

Murdering about 19 heavily armed europeans in about 40 seconds of fun.

Making out with a woman, then shooting her in the head a few hours later.



I mean, how much more manlier could you be? Well, I mean other than having a huge beard.

BUT OH WAIT. Who had a huge beard during the first few episodes? Oh, wait, Jack the dude did. He couldn't get much manlier unless he, like, actually MORPHED into Oli Gill and started air guitaring.



Hey hey! Peep Show is on.

Now, heres a bit of a mathematical equation:

Peep Show = Bloody genius.

Basically, its... no, fuck you again, watch the show yourself.

Its like punching yourself in the face repeatedly with a fish. Or a fist. You know. Its the most painful show known to man. Its LIKE THE OFFICE (SUBLIME GENIUS), BUT FROM THE VIEWPOINT OF DAVID BRENT. Hearing his thoughts. Huzzah.

Ah, man. This show rules. Except the new theme tune is a bit dump.

Here are quotes from this episode's genius:



"Come on man. Relax. Live a little. You could get brown shoes. Actually, better get black. Best not go mad."

"Keep feeling my foot. Please."

"Wow, free chocko. Tasty." ... "The extra ingredient is CRIME."

"Its cool. I'm not a stalker. I thank shop girls for their advice with chocolate."

"Good old Columbo. Just the one technique, of course. Still, SHITS on Quincy."

"Bez... well you know Flava Fla from public enemy?" ... "No." ... "Well its kinda like him. Except with maracas."



Dear me. I'm laughing too hard. Its hilarious.

So you don't get it. Screw you. Piffle.



Shooooot your zombos in the head with a SHOTGUN, fool!