If you could be reincarnated as any appliance, what would it be and why?

I limited the amount of dildos down to two. And Micheal: clitoral stimulators, rabbits, vibrators - all basically the same thing, you dirty so and so. Anyway...



Me: A robot. A robot ninja. I'm sure you can get robot ninjas as household appliances. You know, to act as cooks or something. They have cool swords for chopping up cucumber.



Dear, dear, lovely Roxxxxxxxxxay: An electric razor ... why not?



Oliver Gale Grant, the imitated by Gill: I would like to be a suppository because I love going up the arses of men with strange diseases, and I am very lubricated.



Bertie, who has to be drunk: A fishing rod, because I would spin around the handle bit.

(Um...)



Fati of the painted jeans: I would be a smoothie maker, because you can make milkshakes in a smoothie maker too and milkshakes are yummy.



Cassandra the cleavage: I hate appliances *scowls*



Marios the pervert: Vibrator... Obvious....

(he originally wanted to be a washing machine)



Oli Gill, the manliest man around: Dildo...do what I used to do.



Paul the optimist - egg timer - It's one of those useless things that no-one actually wants but it's always there anyway. I feel that I can relate to it.



Random Alkie Girl - A bottle opener. I like opening bottles... and then drinking them.



Clever Ben: A wooden spoon because you could be dunked in all things nice... like cake mix. Mmmm.



Mike the other pervert - a sports bra - it's not in contact with the female genitalia BUT it is in contact with the female body.

(He also tried every possible name for dildo in the entire universe)



Zombies. Killed. With. Fishing rods. Spin. Them. To. Death.